Sunday, March 15, 2009

Louisiana, Dan Dan, and Lifelock

So...we are home from our trip to Louisiana and had a great time. It went something like this:

Tuesday night: Leave CC, drive to Houston, stay with Grandma Guerra (4 hours)
Wednesday morning: Leave Houston, drive to New Orleans (6 hours)
Thursday afternoon: Leave New Orleans, drive to Ville Platte, LA (3 hours)
Sunday morning: Leave Ville Platte, drive home (8.5 hours)

I have to start by giving Wes kudos for being such a trooper considering the amount of time he spent staring at the backseat. He was awesome. 

I will just give the details of my stories here, and Jade can add the fun pictures later. 

Dan Dan: 
We were walking along the riverfront in New Orleans when a nice man bets me he can tell me where I got my shoes. If he guesses right, I pay for a shoe shine and if he is wrong, I get a free shine.  I take a quick look to make sure that I am not wearing anything that tells where I am from. (I also checked to make sure he wasn't wearing the same shoes). Everything looked good, so I shook his hand and told him I was true to my word. (This isn't like someone guessing your weight at a carnival. This is real psychic stuff, right).

He then said this: "Alright then, sir. You got your shoes on your feet, your feet on Decatur Street, Decatur Street is here in the fine city of New Orleans! I said I'd tell you where you got 'em, not where you bought 'em. And you got 'em right here." 

He took a bit of polish out of a bottle cap and rubbed it on each side of my shoe. He also said some other stuff that we couldn't really hear or understand very well since he was bent over polishing my shoe. (Apparently this was the fine print.) Although, I did hear him ask, "Did I hold a gun to your head or a knife to your throat?" To which I replied, "No, sir." I assume this meant I had entered a legally binding agreement without coercion. 

Then he held out his hand expectantly. I asked him what he wanted and he said $10 for each shoe. I told him that was too much, that he just rubbed some polish (maybe even glue for all I know) alongside the bottom of my tennis shoe. That's when he told me that I was paying for the entertainment, not for the shine. I tried to talk him down in price, but he threw the, "I'm a man of my word," back in my face and I didn't have much choice then, so I gave the man his money. 

Later that  night at the hotel, I told Jade I was thinking about going back and having a grammar lesson with him, but somehow I don't think it would've mattered. I'm sure in a couple weeks, I will tell this story and laugh. For now, I'll just tell it. I will say I wasn't the first and I definitely won't be the last. Has anybody else met Dan Dan?

The other story can be kind of boring so I'll just hit the high points. Someone got a hold of my debit card number and placed a bunch of online orders for health insurance, life insurance, weight loss tea, Sensa (weight-loss something or other), eBay kits, other random stuff, and....Lifelock. What's the point? Just to cause frustration in someones day? At least buy something cool. And is the Lifelock thing to teach me a lesson? Are they insinuating that I also need to lose weight? 

I also need to give props to Bank of America for taking care of everything so quickly. They're my people.


  1. well, at least we have a good story to tell about Dan Dan. New Orleans in 2 days is definitely what you call a whirlwind adventure. And I'm glad we shared it together, sweet'ums.

  2. My wife and I met Dan Dan on our honeymoon in 2001. I recall him saying "10 for the line, 10 for the shine" which indeed was $10 per shoe. I also though he was a psychic, or one of those people who could discern a person's origin by dialect, etc.

    One of my favorite stories... my wife and I used Dan Dan as a way to get out of paying anyone else the rest of the trip.

    "Hey, you got $5 man?"

    "Nope, sorry, Dan Dan got my extra cash..."

    "Ahhhh" (said very knowingly, with not a small amount of awe.)