Saturday, December 31, 2011

Safe and Sound

I feel as though I ought to be a little more emotional, a little more sentimental tonight. I'm seeing cheers for the New Year ringing across my iPhone screen, but it's very subdued and quiet in my little blue house tonight. My cute husband is out serving the people of our city, doing what he can to make a difference in the world. I have both our boys tucked away in bed. And here I sit, eating a bowl of cereal, switching forth between Words with Friends, re-reading my favorite books, and checking the computer for something...anything. My best friends are scattered, my brother was here briefly, entertaining the boys with nerf guns and bug farms...

But now it's quiet. And my eyes are sleepy (and I'm battling a head cold). And my heart is full of the miraculous, beautiful, and memorable ups and downs that 2011 brought. Quiet reflection. Marveling at how quickly the year has passed. How far we've come and how our journeys are further still.

I would be lying to you if I said I was cheerfully welcoming in 2012. It may be that I am ringing in the new year by myself (and a bowl of captain crunch).

But truly. I know I am not alone. It's a quiet rebuff from the Maker of love and thunder...I am not alone this night. The new adventure of a new  year lays before my little family and I can only look back and be thankful and look ahead and be expectant.

So here's to a sweet night to myself, reading, meditating, and praising the Maker above for the days past, and the new days ahead.


PS here is my current favorite song...

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Be Merry. Be Bright.

Gather 'round, ye children, come
Listen to the old, old story
Of the pow'r of death undone
By an infant born of glory
Son of God, Son of Man
Gather 'round, remember now
How creation held its breath
How it let out a sigh
And it filled up the sky with the angels
Son of God, Son of Man

So sing out with joy for the brave little boy
Who was God, but he made himself nothing
Well he gave up his pride and he came here to die
Like a man
Therefore God exalted him
To the place of highest praises
And he gave him a name above every name
That at the very name of Jesus, Son of God

We would sing out with joy for the brave little boy
Who was God, but he made himself nothing
Well he gave up his pride and he came here to die
Like a man
So in heav'n and earth and below
Every knee would bow and worship
And ev'ry tongue would proclaim
That Jesus, He reigns with the angels

So sing out with joy for the brave little boy
Who was God but he made himself nothing
Well he gave up his pride and he came here to die
Like a man
So gather 'round, ye children come
Listen to the old, old story
Of the power of death undone
By an infant born of glory
Son of God, Son of Man

Saturday, December 24, 2011

{on Christmas}

No, the Bible isn’t a book of rules or a book of heroes.  
The Bible is most of all a story.  
It’s an adventure story about a young hero who comes from a far country to win back His lost treasure.  
It’s a love story about a brave prince who leaves His palace, His throne, everything to rescue the one He loves.  
It’s like the most wonderful of fairy tales that has come true in real life.   
You see, the best thing about this story is:  it’s true. 

There are lots of stories in the Bible, but all the stories are telling one big story:  the story of how God loves His children and comes to rescue them.  
It takes the whole Bible to tell this story, and at the center of the story is a baby.  
Every story in the Bible whispers His name.  
He is like the missing piece in a puzzle.  
The piece that makes all the other pieces fit together, and suddenly you can see a beautiful picture.
An excerpt from the Children's Storybook Bible written by Sally Lloyd Jones

I may or may not find a moment to jump on here tomorrow on Christmas day.

So if I miss you... Happy Christmas, to you & yours. If you haven't, I still encourage you to download the Behold the Lamb of God album by Andrew Peterson. You will not regret it.

xo, jade...

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Color Me Jade


Since Christmas is only days away, I just wanted to remind you beautiful Corpus Christi folk that I have 10 pieces of art hanging in Coffee Waves (the downtown location next to Exec Surf Club). Some are old. Some are new. Some are pink. Some are blue. Some are small. Some are tall. But all are by me and as fun as can be!

How cheesy was that? :)

 Either way, cheese or no cheese, go check them out before I take them down next week! I happen to love a lot of them and have heard some sweet compliments from some sweet, sweet friends about them. Thanks for the love, yall. Thanks for the love. <3

Oh and get yourself a hot chocolate.
Mmmm....i love Coffee Waves hot chocolate.

Go check 'em out! And tell your friends.

xo, jade...

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Hannah and Andrew

Just popping in to check how you all are doing!

And I also wanted to throw a quick message out to you today as you prepare for the holiday this weekend.

One of my high school best friends has an older sister who was a mentor to me through those beautiful, awkward teenage years. I always marveled at his relationship with his sweet, nurturing sister, because it wasn't the sort of sibling relationship you often would see. They were a team and it encouraged me in ways they never knew of. I loved his family deeply and though we drifted apart after graduation, they have always had a special place nestled deep in my heart.

When his older sister was arrested for murder years later, I knew she was innocent. I avoided the news at all cost because I knew it was lies that were being spewed from their hateful lips. She is an angel and a person I desperately wanted to emmulate. As a wife. And as a mom. As a woman who fought for Jesus with her whole heart.

I was a newlywed when she was imprisoned for a charge that I knew to be false.
Now I'm a mother of two and she is still serving her life sentence while her 5 beautiful babies wait for her to come home.

If you want to give me a present for Christmas, it's this:

Read this article and do what you can for Hannah.

She is still mentoring me to this day. Even from behind prison bars. She is still teaching me how to be a wife. A mother. But most importantly, she is still teaching me how to love the Lord with all my heart.

Read this. Please.

You can also go to this website and write a letter to the powers that be and cry out for her release

Thank you for reading this.
Thank you Texas Monthly for the article.
And thank you Nate Saenz for being my friend all those years ago.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Don't miss this

On Sunday my cute husband whirled me away to Austin, Tx where I was able to see my favorite artist (and many of my other favorites) performing.

To say that it was anything but perfect would be blasphemy. It truly was one of the most special moments for me. Right now I cannot even begin to explain the wellspring of joy that sparkled within me as I sat in that auditorium.

I DO want to write a full length retelling of the evening for you and I would like to share with you all the different artists and the gifts that they bring to their sweet circle of friendship and what they mean to me. (Yes, i said that in one breath)

But I won't do that now.
I just wanted to share with you quickly how this one particular album BEHOLD THE LAMB OF GOD is played in my home each morning and how this mornig I woke with frustration building up in my heart, and negativity dying to escape my lips.

It's true. There is no reason at all for my attitude.

I put this album on  (like I do every morning) while I prayed and made breakfast for my little explorers and I was overcome with emotion of the music and the reality of the words. It's exactly what I needed.

If you don't own this album, close this window and buy it. You need to do this for yourself.

{side-note: there is also a remarkable book by Russ Ramsey that is an advent calendar of sorts. It's beautiful, truthful, and is a great companion to this that too}

Saturday, December 03, 2011

[A wee bit of trim]

This is finally happening in our little blue house.

Ah, Christmas, you sure sparkle.

I'm thankful for my husband who reminds me what Christmas is really about. 
He is a mountain mover like no other.

<3 I love you, husband. You have no idea.
Christmastime 2011

xo, jade....

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Jack & Jade

I was a teeny little girl when I was first introduced to Narnia. So young, in fact, I was frustrated by the language of the story and threw the book across my room and said "this is so stupid". I was attending a Church of Christ at the time with my family, relatively open to obedience, and faith, and books. I read The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe once, and never touched it again until my middle school days. I re-read it, which was like reading it for the first time, and I liked it. Only mildly, but I enjoyed it enough to keep the book. Then I made my way to my high school years, and read it again. Only this time, I read it long into the night, went straight to the pretty bookstore, and bought some other Narnian books. I began to absorb everything about this world that had become so dear to my heart.

Lucy was my favorite. She was brave. With a beautiful heart. And an even fiercer determination. She loved her siblings through their failures, and through their victories. But most of all, she loved Aslan with abandon and the tears she shed for him when he lay on that stone table mirrored my own. She loved him. And I loved him.

Then, Peter, Edmund, and Susan also captured my heart. The siblings who bickered, who were young and ridiculous, also grew to be regal Queens and Kings. They were imperfect. So many flaws. But they persevered.

Map of Narnia
And Aslan. With all of his goodness. All of his sacrifice. All of his wildness. Of course HE isn't tame. But HE is good. My beloved.

Then, I began to read beyond Narnia. Who was this man who had written these stories and wound his way into my heart? How I wished I could weave a tale like him. Who was he and why did he make me feel like I could fly? He encouraged my own bravery. My own love for people. And my own quest for queenship. For I knew in my heart that I was no simple human, but a princess in the making, and a future queen of a kingdom far away. Who was this man?

He was a simple fellow, from a simple family, who served in a war, and who had died when my parents were the age that my sweet firstborn is now. He was oddly named. Clive? Staples? Lewis? Three names that were unfamiliar to me. Though, of course he went by his childhood nickname of "Jack" and lived a strange life in a big old house with some obscure people.

I was in love. I read every book that I could get my hands on. My favorites still were among the Narnian tales. Once a King or Queen of Narnia, always a King or Queen of Narnia. We even named our second-born son, Lewis, after this man.

Happy Birthday Jack. You've made my life so colorful. I struggle, even now, for the words to express my deep gratitude.

xo, jade....

Sunday, November 27, 2011


Tis the season to be silly!
Yep. Found us a big, gorgeous Christmas tree to sit under (near my parent's house) and I grabbed a few pics of my fam + my bff and her mama. It was a fun ol time.


Here's my favorite of the night.
Me and my oldest at our finest....

And, do you see those sparkly, twinkle lights in the background???

YES! It's one of my favorite things about Christmas.


xoxo, jade.....

{editor's note: I changed up our blog background+header [slightly]. Let me know what you think!}

Thursday, November 24, 2011

{On Giving Thanks}

My favorite time of year. Quality family time. Beautiful things all around me. Twinkles in the eyes of so many. I find myself sitting in silence and overwhelmed to the point of tears by how much goodness really does surround me. I won't make a list. I won't spill my heart now. But I will leave you with this poem penned by my favorite artist, Andrew Peterson. And PS if you don't follow the goings-on of the Rabbit Room, then please, do some research, meet the proprietor, and feast yourself on the beauty that is the RR family.

{O God, Magnificent Confounder,
Boundless in mercy and power,
Be near me in my apathy.
Be near me, Savage Dreamer,
Bright Igniter of Exploding Suns,
But not too near. I’d like to live,
By your grace, just long enough
To taste another perfect steak.
And to see my children marry,
And, perhaps, to pen a memoir.
Great redeemer of my lechery,
Bright Dawn of Blessed Hope,
Lay waste to every prideful thing,
Each black infraction of your law.
O Swirling Storm of Holy Anger,
Be patient with me. I’m certain
I will make a second gluttonous
Trip to the festal spread of food.
And I might as well admit, O King
Omniscient, I plan to make a third.
And that will lead to sloth, I know,
If only for the afternoon. Awake,
O sleeper! But not yet, not yet.
I want to dream a dream of light
In Heaven’s towering splendor.
I long, my Lord, to walk its streets
Or better yet, to drive them.
I’ve always wanted a motorcycle,
A cool one that blats and rumbles
Like a herd of flaming zebras.
I could totally impress the ladies
With my holy rolling zebra steed,
But only by your perfect pleasure,
Ruler of the angel armies, blaster
Of the horn of strength, would I ride
The golden highways awesomely.
O Wisdom of the Ages, speak!
Sing to me of secret knowledge
Open wide the gates of truth,
And let me learn it, by your grace,
Through the medium of television–
Smartly written situational comedy,
Perhaps, or an epic space opera.
Let me taste the honey of your word,
My beloved savior. Seriously. Save me
From my wit, my words, my songs,
My sin, my bad poems, my vanity,
My every single human impulse,
Except the ones I like and am able
To justify using my corruptible
Reason, my imperfect understanding,
And my belief in your inexhaustible
Forgiveness. When I awake, saintly,
I will consume a dish of pumpkin pie.
And, as I politely swallow a belch,
I will lean my heart on yours, Almighty,
To whom, alone, is due thanksgiving.}

xo, jade....

Thursday, November 17, 2011


My beautiful friend Julie posted this sweet little Do's & Don't's of her life today.
I appreciated the humor. The honesty. And the perspective.

More often than I'd like to admit, I battle with those rotton feelings of insecurity and I ask myself those comsic questions "Am I doing this right?" "Am I messing up?"

You human beings know what I'm talking about. Whether your story is leading you on a road of motherhood, fatherhood...or if you're walking the mighty walk of singleness. Or you may be a teacher, a student. Whatever your story, you're human, thus (according to our old natures) giving you the ground to fight with yourself.

I very much enjoy it when a window is opened for me and light shines in and I realize my moments on this earth are directed by a much higher, and much more beautiful God of hope. If I were doing the directing of my story, it would be quite the mess. (You KNOW how unorganized I am).

So reflecting back on Julie's post (she's pregnant with her fourth son and one of my most favorite of women) I smile with pleasure at the thought of all that DOES and DOES NOT go on in our house. :)

Shall I share a few with you now?

  • I do have a morning and afternoon playlist of music for our house to listen to
  • I do take the boys for lots of walks
  • I do let art happen
  • I do read to my boys often and in different voices
  • I do tell stories that come out of my head
  • I do get on the floor and play with them
  • I do feed my boys fruits and veggies...and crackers and cookies
  • I do sing to my boys (not very well)
  • I do take pictures every day and show the finished work to the boys
  • I do take the boys exploring the city
  • I do emphasize the need for salvation and pray with and over my children daily
  • I do serve cereal. For breakfast, lunch or dinner
  • I do let tv happen
  • I do enforce chores with my 3 year old
  • I do allow imaginations to fly and dirt inside the house
  • I do cook....sometimes :)
  • I do give lots of hugs and kisses
  • I do take my boys to Camp Zephyr to play and explore
  • I do let them have a dog to love and be loved by
  • I do turn shopping trips into educational experiences
  • I do laugh (a lot) with my kids
  • I do allow them to see me cry

  • I don't allow bad manners
  • I don't shop organic
  • I don't have my own chickens
  • I don't get 8 hours of sleep
  • I don't mind reading the same stories over and over
  • I don't sew. At all.
  • I don't do math. Ever
  • I don't eat canned green beans, so rarely does my family
  • I don't put the boys in school or day care
  • I don't enforce bedtime
  • I don't sort laundry.....or keep up with it, often
  • I don't pressure for perfection.
  • I don't mind listening to every David Crowder album in one day
  • I don't always have a game plan
  • I don't take showers every day. (that ones for you Julie)

The list goes on, but I'm thankful for the perspective. The things that I do and do not allow to happen in my home are all wonderful, silly, learning experiences. And while I don't have a "parenting" game plan, I'm thankful for wisdom from others, for my own intuition, and for the direction of an Almighty God. 


xo, jade....

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

{To Narnia}

I can't get Narnia out of my head tonight.

Ever have those days where it moves so fast, that suddenly it's nearly 11pm and the moon is quickly climbing high in the sky.....and you find yourself wide awake.

My house is quiet.

Well...except for the whirring of the fans
and Andrew Peterson and Jill Phillips playing in my iTunes rotation.

I wish they were my real friends.

Not to say I'm not thankful for the friends that surround me daily. I am blessed indeed by such a beautiful community of caring and loving and creative individuals.

But sometimes I feel like I'm in the wrong place.

I don't love South Texas.
I love many many people here.
But I don't love it HERE.

But I wonder. Would I love it anywhere?
(the mountain dweller within me is SCREAMING yes yes yes!!)

But truly. Would I be happier in the north? Or maybe even further south (NOOOO!)

Did you know that it has been twelve days since we flew home from Colorado.
And I have looked at a picture of the mountains every day since.

No. I know it's not the mountains that I'm thinking about tonight. Beautiful as they are.
I know it's not my dissatisfaction with a region that makes me restless.

It's because I'm living in a temporary place.
This is not my home.

I think of how I read Narnia every year. A couple times, actually. It's in my head. In my brain. In my heart. In my very being.

I must remember to thank good ol Jack Lewis for his nice words. They are such pretty words that have wound up my heart until it feels it might burst.

Not to mention the thunder I heard today. I heard it in the distance as I drove home. I felt this strange giddyness, just hoping that I would see some lightning.
And sure enough...a bright streak across the sky.

And Rich filled my head with his pretty words. Ah, they are such pretty words.

This is me smiling. ::smile::

Ah. back to work.

xo, jade...

Sunday, November 13, 2011

{on kissing}

"The decision to kiss for the first time
is the most crucial
in any love story.
It changes the relationship
of two people
much more strongly
than even the final surrender;
because this kiss already has within it
that surrender."
--Emil Ludwig


Saturday, November 12, 2011

Baby, baby, oh baby!

Yea. I've had baby fever bad.
Several of my friends are pregnant.
Spencer has turned one.
I told myself I'd give myself until his first birthday before I even THOUGHT about any more kids.
But truly, I've been baby feverish since he was born. Daydreaming about another baby, thinking how wonderful it would be to have kids close in age.

It was a weird feeling, holding my sweet, little Spencer in my arms at the hospital. He was perfect. Healthy. Whole. And so beautiful. So, so very beautiful. Wesley was beyond amazing. The superb big brother. So much joy was just rolling off him. Our sweet little family of four felt so, so good.

But I still felt like our family was incomplete. Don't call me ungrateful for what I've been given, but I just felt it in the very depths of my being that our family was still missing a piece. I cherish my little men, and my beautiful husband so closely to my heart. I wake each day with a thankfulness that I cannot even begin to express in the language of men.

But I still feel like there is someone missing from the equation.

Mom friends of mine who are "done" having kids have told me that  you just "know" when it's time. I know we could get into all sorts of discussions about that, but I can honestly understand the intuitive feeling of "knowing" that you just aren't done having babies. Even when our society says STOP making babies. Even when people suggest that the world is only growing sadder and more chaotic. Even when the economy fuels hopelessness into the human heart.

I still feel like our family isn't complete. Nate felt it too.

I'm not saying we're going to get pregnant soon. I'm not saying adoption is out of the question. I don't know where our family is going. I can only cuddle my children, kiss my husband, and keep living each day full of thankfulness.

This is the month that we celebrate thanksgiving.

And I am so, so thankful for the babies in my life. Especially the two that look like me and Nate. :)


Wednesday, November 09, 2011

"If you want to see the stars you must go out into the country where there are no lights to dim them.
But if you really want to see the stars then you must be out in the middle of the ocean.
Then you can see them as the sailors and navigators saw them in the days when stars were known as very few people know them now."
- Madeleine L'Engle, Arm of the Starfish

Monday, November 07, 2011

{all the pretty mountains II}

snow kissed :)
 Yes, my friend Abby said it best: snowflakes and mountains are in my soul. I'm a south Texas girl who looks out her window and sees Mesquite trees and burnt grass. I live by the Gulf of Mexico and I see wishy washy beaches. Though, to be fair, the waves do {always} capture my interest, and often I stand at the waters edge and think of those I've loved and lost, and am often swept away by the beauty of the salty seas and my own memories.

But the mountains and their majestic wisdom tower over me with a power that I cannot explain. Their rocky halls are mysterious and beautiful to me and I am often left speechless. The first time I met the mountains, I was 15 years old and quite dreamy. (Who am I kidding? I'm halfway to 28 and I still have fluff between my ears) The first time I laid my eyes on those towering cities of rock and moss and tree, I stood in silence and wonder. I was anxious to explore them, and hike I did. With a group of people I barely knew, but was anxious to impress. Thankfully, I didn't need to impress them and they loved me in spite of myself. The mountains, they loved me too. And I felt peace. And I felt whole.

My husband, he loved me in spite of myself too. He married me with sparkling eyes, and swept me away to the mountains surrounding Estes Park for our honeymoon. And it was perfect.

And finally, nearly 6 years later, we were able to go back to the mountains that I love, even if the trip was brief and busy. My heart swelled with peace again and I longed to have my little explorers there with us (though I quite enjoyed the special alone time the husband and I celebrated). I just know the first time I bring my sons to the mountains, they will marvel in the beauty and majesty that has stolen their mama's heart. Wesley is very attuned to the matters of the heart and soul, and I am excited to see him fall in love with those old hills just as I have.

the view from our hotel
So the reason we went to Colorado was that Nate had some training to do in Denver. He was in meetings for about 5 or 6 hours during the day, and we were free to explore and have fun in the evenings. For any mom, getaways are vital. But it's rare for mamas to get alone time. Usually the "getaways" involve the daddys (which is a GOOD thing) but the alone time for me in the land that I love was beyond magical. I was able to explore, and eat by myself, and sit on a bench outside and just absorb the beauty around me (with a peppermint mocha in hand). It was splendid. I also was able to spend some time with one of Nathan's co-workers charming lady love. She was wonderful to spend time with. I enjoyed her company immensely.

The best part of the trip was the snow. God knew it was just what I needed and on the second evening we spent in Denver, Nate and I were curled up on the big bed with our books and computer, watching the snow fall out our window. We were like kids, jumping up every so often and pressing our faces up to the window to watch the snow fall. And when we awoke, the snow had blanketed everything in this glorious, magical white veil. It was perfection. And really, really cold. :) I loved it. I dragged Nate's co worker around and made him take pics of us. He was a good sport, for sure :)
One of the most comfortable hotels I've stayed at

Thankfully, our fabulous hotel (Element by Westin) had a shuttle service, so i didn't have to drive myself around through the snow (I wasn't ready to test my snow-driving skills on a rental) so the driver dropped me off at the mall. {Let me also insert here that I absolutely LOVED our hotel. One of the best we've stayed at} I walked around the mall and met mall employees and had lunch with my new friend, and just enjoyed myself. A policeman saw me walking around outside in the snow (it was still snowing pretty steadily) smiling to myself, and I squeaked "I'm not from here...." to which he just smiled and gave me that look that said "i knew that already".

At one point, we drove around to one of the local state parks and the big sky, meeting the big cliffs, meeting the wide, open prairie, made me swoon and I couldn't get this song out of my head. It just bubbled out and I couldn't stop squealing from the joy of it.

We missed Wesley :)
We missed Spencer :)
I am so ridiculous, but I am so so thankful for our little trip. Four days away from my babies was tough, but four days away with my husband + some bonus alone time was magical.

Magical. :)


Thursday, November 03, 2011

{all the pretty mountains}

Denver, Colorado

Sigh. I just arrived home to our little blue house from one of the most magical places on earth.

Denver, Colorado, you gorgeous town, you. You have stolen my heart.

More details on the trip to come.
Stay tuned, I know you are just sooo anxious to hear about it.


Sunday, October 30, 2011

Baby Dos

On his birthday morning
I love my baby dos. His birthday week (and weekend) was spectacular. He is such a chill little baby, we delighted in celebrating him. You know, since we were sick last week (horribly sick with a stomach bug) we couldn't really see past the next trip to the bathroom (tmi?) so when we were feeling better on Monday, we decided to throw together a party for my baby dos in a week.

I think the party turned out quite well considering how last minute it was.

The most important thing though was being able to relax, have a beautiful afternoon outside celebrating my little love.

Eating his cake
Spencer wasn't so sure about the cake. He put him in his high chair with it and he complained about being strapped in when he wanted to run around. We all laughed, took some pictures, and then he finally realized what was in front of him and boy, did he go to town :)

I look at pictures of him that we've taken over the last year and my heart just swells with so much peace and joy. Children (as cliche as this sounds) TRULY are a gift from Heaven.

My happiness comes from above, but I do delight in the little beings that I'm blessed to shepherd. It makes me giddy thinking that God may have more kids planned for us.

I must have the baby bug :) because I just see babies and melt into a puddle on the ground. Swoon.

no hands! haha
Have a great Sunday! I snuck a nap in, and I feel like a brand new person. I'm seriously thankful for naps too.

And I was also so thankful to make it to church for the first time in THREE weeks this morning. Even though Nate and I missed out on the celebration because we were in the 3yr old classroom teaching, it was WONDERFUL to be there.

This is me smiling.

xo, jade.

Friday, October 28, 2011

The Circle of Life

No, I'm not going to start singing Hakuna Mata (which I believe is really bad theology anyways) but I have been pondering on the big circle that our lives make. How we're more of a grid, really, and always intermingling, always threading through each others lives to create this marvelous, miraculous tapestry.

Today my smallest son turns one.

Two years ago, my beloved friend, Joe Houston, closed his eyes here on earth and opened them in paradise.

I am one of those swoony, whiney people who is always asking questions as to why things happen. My mom says that it started really early with me, especially when my friends parents started splitting and I started to see beyond the bubble that my safe little world resided in.

Then, as a teenager, I felt hungry. Hungry for the great, wide open. For big things to happen. For meaning in the smallest things. I questioned things constantly. Argued frequently. Loved deeply.

Then I was invited to a yellow church down the street and went. And that's where I met the Maker. In a creaky, old pew, with hard backs, and hymnals in the pockets. I found peace. I found salvation. I found that the world was at my fingertips, because I had the rush of empowerment soaring through my veins. It suddenly wasn't about me anymore. And I liked it. And I feared it. But mostly, I pursued it.

Then I grew up and slowly started seeing how much more difficult life is than I realized. Oh, the pain and grief of innocence-loss is true. BUT, I knew the sweet victory of salvation, so these difficult times were made all the easier. Hard. Still. BUT, good.

In my quest for love, light, beauty, and good stories, I've realized that life does come full circle. I'm 27 years old, and I'm slowly starting to have memories of my mom when she was my age, with two small children. I look in the mirror and I see the same smiling face. The same dimples. She, as a young mom, opened the doors for BIG imagination in my life. That compounded with my dad's affection for books and stories created in me a whirling dervish of a person. One that I think my family appreciates, and laughs at. And sometimes shakes their head at.

And I deeply desire to see that freedom ringing in my children's hearts. The same delight in something greater, something bigger, something more beautiful than they'll ever understand. I sometimes think I catch that glimmer in Wesley or Spencer's eyes when I play a song of worship for them. I see the beauty of the words shining in their eyes and they sing along. (Though, at the moment, I think Spencer's favorite song is The Bear song)

Life moves fast. It goes by in a blink. But my children are still young, and I want to do all that I can to open up their hearts to the One that they need most. So that they can feel freedom ringing in their veins, and they can love deeply and run with perseverance the race marked out for them. I look forward to the conversations we'll have when they begin to ask the hard questions.

Joe and his son Asher, summer 2009
I miss my friend Joe. But I'm thankful that we had those months together to grow and love and teach eachother. I can't quite phrase the depth of my affection for him or his family. I struggle with even remembering some of those times together, because his earthly exit was so abrupt and so frustrating. You can read more about his story here, and how we searched for him for three weeks before his body was recovered by the Coast Guard off the coast of Matagorda Island.

I realize this must sound grim to you, speaking of such grief on my son's birthday. But truly, we loved Joe well and delight in his memory. The pain is true, but the gratefulness for him will never fade.

Happy Birthday pumpkin!
Happy Birthday, Spencer, little buddy. Your mama and dadda and bubba love you so. You were born to shine brightly.

Happy Re-birth, Joe. We know we'll see you again someday, friend.

xo, jade.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011


This morning I was gathering a few pictures of Spencer for his birthday party that we are having for him this weekend. It's just going to be a small party, no exact theme and nothing too fancy, but I want it to be enjoyable and about him! So I'm printing some pictures of my littlest son and giving thanks in a big way as I look through these sweet moments captured throughout his first year.
I couldn't help but begin to cry as I saw some of these pictures. The memories began flooding my heart, and I just nearly lost it. Wesley was looking at my like I was crazy, but truly, my heart is full right now.

Steven Curtis Chapman's song "Close To Your Heart" with Matt Redman is playing in the background, and the lyrics were just too much for me, combined with the pictures of my little family scrolling before my eyes. I've made bold the lyrics that just melted me..

I'll share the lyrics with you now:

Though hope is clouded
It has not left us
Though pain runs deep now
You’re deeper still
And You are holding
All things together
Hold us together now
We have this hope
An anchor for the soul
We have this truth
A compass for the heart
You’ve gone before us
And You are with us
And You will carry us through
You will carry us close to Your heart

Here is confusion
Where is the meaning?
But we are trusting
Your Father love
And You are holding
All things together
Hold us together now
We have this hope
An anchor for the soul
We have this truth
A compass for the heart
You’ve gone before us
And You are with us
And You will carry us through
And You will carry us close to Your heart
Close to Your Heart
Safe in the arms of Jesus
She’s safe in the arms of Jesus
We’re safe in the arms of Jesus
We’re safe in the arms of Jesus
We’re safe in the arms of Jesus
Safe in the arms of Jesus
We’re safe in the arms of Jesus
She’s safe in the arms of Jesus
We have this hope
An anchor for the soul
We have this truth
A compass for the heart
You’ve gone before us
And you are with us
And You will carry us through
You will carry us close
You have carried her home
You have carried her home to Your heart.

Spencer, maybe hours old..
October is full of very sentimental memories for me. The major one being Joe, our precious friend, was lost during a military training exercise over the waters of our gulf near Matagorda Island. My heart aches for him still, and while Spencer was born on the anniversary of the day Joe walked into eternity, I am thankful for my memory. I am able to build new memories with my second son, now, and keep close to my heart the memories of Glyndell's second son, Joe.

Fear has always been that awful companion to me for years. It's something I've battled and continue to do so, but this song gave me much peace as I remember my friend, give thanks for my son, and trust God for the future (and any other mini-nate and jades that come our way)

What are you thankful for today, with the sun shining, and the music playing?

Saturday, October 22, 2011

4 in 4

Little Brother, turns one in a week!
Yes sir. Four out of four of us have been terribly sick this month. Normally, October is one of my favorite months. It's fraught with so many wonderful, and not so wonderful memories, and I just have always held it close. Plus I have a child born this month and any month celebrating a baby is a good month to me. I just have really struggled with this October. So much has changed in a few years, so many emotions to register. And to top it off, our little blue house has been struck with some awful, terrible, menacing, not-nice stomach virus. All four of us have been sick and while the kids seem to be better and Nate and I are extremely sick, I'm PRAYING that they are spared from any more sickness. They have been troopers while I've been bedridden (missing me) and still smiling and playing with daddy (who is NOW very sick).

I'm just heartbroken that we are spending these days wallowing and sick. No more of it, I'm calling out for good health for this house. I appreciate your prayers and love. Seriously. You have no idea how your encouragement is so good for the soul.
Big Brother saw an ice cream truck!

And besides. These two smiling faces are worth every fight in us to get better. There are pumpkins to be carved and paintings to be painted (stay tuned for an exciting post about that later).

Pray for healing. For health. And for happy hearts.

time to go sanitize some more....

keepin it real,

Thursday, October 13, 2011


Twice this week it has stormed beautifully and I wasn't able to stay home to enjoy it. Twice.
I don't know about you, but for a girl who loves to cozy it up with husband while a storm is blowing around outside, that's just plain sad news all around.
The storm this morning was a little crazy. It was loud and thunderous, but then it was gone. Wes had a dentist appointment and by the time we left, green balloon in hand, it had blown itself out into the gulf.

I do so love cozy rainy days at home with all my family nestled together on the couch.

Anyone been to any good pumpkin patches lately? I think we're gonna try and make it to one this weekend.

Guess I should make sure my batteries are charged.
I love pumpkins.
And the fall..
and my family.

Monday, October 03, 2011

Happy 30th Brother!

BG and his 30 candles
So yea, I never finished my week o' birthday posts for my brother's 30th birthday.

The main reason being that he came to town and we celebrated all weekend with family and friends. We had Bistro d'Asia for dinner. Some Black Forrest Star Wars cake goodness for dessert. Played Pictionary (GIRLS rule!). We watched movies, went to the water gardens. Walked through the Art Museum. Had lunch on the balcony of the museum.

We loved the glorious weather. It seemed that fall had made it's way to south Tejas...praying it stays so beautiful. Thankful for the relief from the intense heat we had all summer.

Then on Sunday my family and Nate's family went to church together to celebrate Spencer's dedication to the Lord. It was a short, sweet moment with pictures of this past year scrolling across the screen. It warmed my heart to see my family sitting together, supporting Nathan and I as we pursue God's will for our family.

We desire to honor him and pray that our children would see and hear our heart's cry.

Wesley helped blow out the candles
Darth Vader sat on top of the cake

It was a wonderful weekend with much to celebrate. We always hate to see my brother leave (especially Wesley) but I'm thankful that he doesn't live too, too far away. It was fun hanging out with my folks too. They're a hoot. The boys always have such a grand time with them. Fun stuff.

Jamie's living room all decked out
I hope you had a fun weekend, brother. I know I did! Cheers to a new year! :)
xo, jade

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Thursday. Countdown to 30!

Once again I have 20 minutes until the day is over, but I can't forget my daily countdown to tomorrow, my brother's 30th Birthday!! Check out the previous posts to see what they are all about and to celebrate my brother with me :)

Jason, BG, and Ricky circa 2004, Marble Slab

I'm gonna keep is short and sweet tonight since my brother is actually about 20 feet from me laying on the floor of my living room talking to Wesley. This is one of my favorite pictures of BG. Mainly because these three guys are seriously funny and the memories that we made with them in college are very dear to my heart. I don't know how many games of disc golf these guys have played together. Or how many video games BG and Jason have played (and continue to play) with one another. Words with Friends is a hit too, although I think all three of them are cheaters and use that Words with cheaters app or something. Haha.

Anyways, That is my picture for today of my bro. And That wasn't really a story.

Can't win 'em  all. :) Happy Birthday week, brother!

xo, jade

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Wednesday. Countdown to 30!

Nate, Jason, and BG at the Seeger wedding 2006
Hey! Y'all thought I had forgotten about today's post, huh?? Haha....I still have 40 minutes left of Wednesday.

Today was actually a nutty day and I didn't hardly sit still at all. We had our small group over and it was Shayna's birthday, so we celebrated with sparkly cupcakes and a mashed potato dinner :) It was yummy. The recipe I used for the bbq chicken was snagged from Pinterest. Lovely.

LA, May 2003

Anyways, moving on to my brother's birthday week post. The pics that I chose are kind of weird, and kind of random, but I absolutely love them. They don't really relate to one another at all, but they are some of my favorites.

BG and I didn't really run in the same circles in high school. He jokes that he didn't even know he had a sister until college, and we laugh, but it makes sense. We NEVER hung out. Mostly because we were incredibly different people back then. When I got to college, BG was a good big brother and took me along with him to different functions and BSM events. He even introduced me to Nate, my beloved husband. They were pals, I'm sure you've heard me gush about the story enough....but I owe a lot of my college relationships to my brother and his encouragement to me while I was on the cusp of adulthood.

The guys in the Seeger wedding May 2006
In Tiffys dorm Winter 2002
 BSM banquet with BG and Jamie, May 2007

So it satisfies me now, after all those lost teenage years, to have the same circle of close friends now. He's one of my best friends. And Nate is my best friend. And Jamie is our other best friend. We also have lots of friends who have gone on to get married and have babies. Our friend Jena is newly engaged (to an amazing guy) and we are excited to celebrate with her this coming May. Other friends have moved on, some to new adventures, new jobs, new relationships. We are all living life in a busy, sometimes frustrating, sometimes wonderful, way. But we all have each other. I know that if I ever were to need something, I could call up any one of the people in these pictures and they would help Nate and I out in a jiff. And BG has always been one of the best of friends to these people. He opened up his home so often. He cooks for us. He always drives people around. So these pictures make me grin because it shows how much fun we had in college, and how those relationships we made were forged with authentic living, human mistakes, and triumphant perseverance. I celebrate these relationships. And I'm glad that BG and I have become so close through the years. I really have a ton of college pics and I want to post them all so badly, but I wonder if it would bore you.

 Haha! Finished, and with 5 minutes to spare!
xo, jade

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Tuesday: Countdown to 30

Ok! So I'm back with another fun-filled memory and/or fact to compliment some pictures of my brother. I'm posting a pic or two every day until Friday when my brother turns THIRTY!!! Woohoo! You can trackback to the previous post to see Day 1.

So the favorite pics I'm posting are from the first time that my brother held his nephews. I love looking through the birth pictures of my boys (c-sectioned kiddos) and I just feel SO blessed because both boys have been SO loved and SO cherished since before they were born and I couldn't wait to see what BG would be like with his nephews or nieces. He's always been great with kids, they seem to swarm to him whenever he's in a group of them. Probably because he still plays video games and likes to buy toys.

Uncle holding Wesley: January 2008
Uncle holding Spencer: October 2010
Anyways, Wesley is constantly saying how Uncle is his best buddy and he cries for him on a regular basis. Since my brother doesn't live in town, he generally will stay with us when he visits. Wesley's favorite thing is to RUN to wake Uncle up in the mornings and jump on him. The last time BG was visiting, he left early at 5am before Wes was up and when Wesley came running down the hall to find his uncle, the tears that I had to deal with were a sight to behold.

So great was his disappointment that his uncle had left so early. It was sad sad sad.

BG has been great with the boys since the beginning. We teased him for not wanting to hold Wesley that first day, but babies are a pretty scary thing. He held him though and I could tell they were kindred spirits from the beginning (or whatever manly counterpart to the Anne Shirley reference would be haha). BG had to be in SA the morning I delivered Spencer, but he drove straight to town as soon as he was able and held his little nephew without hesitation. He helped entertain Wesley while we were stuck in the hospital and hung around the whole weekend.

To say that my boys love their uncle is an understatement for sure.

So there you have it.
Stay tuned for tomorrows countdown to 30!!

xo, jade

Monday, September 26, 2011

Monday. Countdown to 30!

My big brother is turning 30 on Friday. It sort of surprises me that we are at that time in our lives where we are leaving another decade....yet again. The transition from the single digits to the double digits is exciting. That 10th birthday party is sort of a big deal. You don't see yourself as a little kid anymore.  Then the leaving of the teens and the entrance into the 20's is similarly exciting, only even better because NOW you are really an adult. I was engaged at 20. And married by 21. That's nuts.

I still have a few years before I hit my 3rd decade mark, but my brother is right on the cusp of it. Nate is between BG and me, so he'll be the next to leave the 20's in our crowd. He's pretty pumped about it....I think. Jamie and I are pretty freaked. We had a hyperventalting conversation with Jena and Bianca last, really. Frightened. And then just a few nights ago I had the same conversation with my friend Abby. We are all excited. Sorta. :)

 As for my wonderful brother, I think he's pretty much gonna rock the transition. I've also decided to do a blog a day revealing a memory or a fun fact about my loveable big brother and a favorite picture or two. I have about a trillion pictures of EVERYONE. Even your Second Uncle twice removed.  Seriously. I'm just crazy like that. Great-grandma Clementine? Yep. Got a picture of her too. But Brandon's tag is definitely one of the most prominent in my photo archives. Lotsa pics of the bro.

So here are a few pictures from our trip to Canada in the Spring of 2005. We were serving some international youth from East Africa, doing after school tutoring and relationship building.

BG on an island on Lake Ontario. Toronto, Canada Spring '05
BG and I were, weirdly enough, on the same team and walked a few blocks, caught a train, took a few buses and finally would make it to the homes of these teenagers. It was a great experience. The contact that we had there was a great guy. He and BG had some good conversations and we really enjoyed the work that we did.  I think that's when I discovered I had a fear of heights. These condos that the students lived in reached high to the sky and I pretty much would get so nauseated from the view. Haha.

 Also, no BSM trip is complete without a trip to a ball game (courtesy of Wayne Dillon) and a few games of Disc Golf. Our team found an amazing park to explore complete with an amazing disc golf course. A small group of us stuck together and took a ferry to this island park on Lake Ontario and spent the afternoon admiring the luscious landscape and playing some dg. (Not me. I hate the sport. I throw like a girl)

BG in Toronto Canada, Spring '05. Jays Baseball Game.
It was a great day and we left the park running full speed for the ball game where we were meeting the rest of our group at. Wayne scored us some killer seats and we had a great time. Even though my fiance and my other bff Jamie couldn't make the trip, it was definitely one for the books. I think BG will agree that it was a fantastic experience and the pictures are some of my favorite. Our good friends became engaged on the trip also and BG was their chaperone. Haha. It was fun.

My favorite pic of the whole trip though is of my super manly brother laying in a field of dandelions with a flower in his mouth. Haha. That's one confident man, alright.

Happy Birthday Week, bro! See y'all tomorrow for the continuing countdown to 30 for my brother!

xo, jade

Thursday, September 22, 2011

{Calling Out Your Name}

"I feel the thunder in the sky. I see the sky about to rain. I hear the prairies calling out your name."

I can't say that I have a favorite line from this song that Rich Mullins wrote. Calling Out Your Name is my favorite song that this man of miraculous joy wrote.  When Rich died, I was young. So young in fact that I still was struggling to comprehend what death really meant. But I did know that we were worse off than he. For he had entered glory. And we were without him. I do remember grieving that loss with tears and questions. I was only a newly saved 13 year old girl with frizzy hair and LOTS of questions. And though I did have many questions, I didn't question the songs that this man had written, because of the truth that I felt in the very fiber of my being.

I have probably purchased nearly every Rich Mullins related album that has been released since his entrance to the Kingdom, and I've adored all of his previously released albums (of course!). But still, anytime I listen to Calling Out Your Name, I weep.

Mainly I weep for the earth. Because it's changing so much that we are losing much of what God intended for it. But still, it knows. The wind, the sun, the rain, the glorious, glorious lightning that holds thunder's hand.....nature has always spoken to me. Probably because I'm an artist who can't help BUT absorb the world around her. Cityscapes can speak to me, but never in the same capacity that a storm rolling up the beach would have on me. (Though you must know by now that my love is passionate about the forests and the mountains.)

I've spoken of (often enough) about my affection for the musician, writer, and artist that is Andrew Peterson. Shayna grows tired of me constantly babbling on the genius of his lyrics and storytelling abilities. My cute husband, who never really cares much for lyrics and puts up with my storybook obsession very patiently, listens to my animated recounting of a recent AP song that touched my heart.

I feel very similar in my affections for other artists like Vicky Beeching, Bethany Dillon, and Christy Nockels, but there is something different about Andrew Peterson's music that reaches out to me. I told Jamie two nights ago (when we foolishly stayed up until 2am catching up on the past few weeks of life) that when I listen to AP's songs, I FEEL like I wrote them. I feel like my heart is speaking out and singing THE STORY to the world. (except, you know, when he's singing about his wife. haha. Then, I feel like their relationship is similar to my own lovely story with Nate and I smile and wonder at the friends we might possibly be and how fun a game of Catch Phrase would be)

Anyways, it clicked. I often listened to Rich Mullins growing up and felt like what he was singing was something that had written. His songs would resonate in the very depths of my being and I felt a chorus of angels following me around grinning as foolishly as I.

All this to say...the world just about nearly imploded when AP released his newest LIVE album "Above These City Lights" and the song "Calling Out Your Name" was on it. I just about fell of my rocker. I was up late, just barely crawling into bed, checking the tweets on my phone, thinking about the conversation I had just had with Jamie, and I saw that the album was released on iTunes already. (it was this late in the early morning hours) and I saw Calling Out Your Name on the album list.

I've never seen AP in concert, so I was unaware that he covered this song ever at his concerts. So great was my delight upon discovering that my current favorite storyteller had (published? released?) a cover of my favorite song!

I checked out You Tube for a potential video of AP singing it, so that I could play it for you all. But truly, buy his record "Above These City Lights". Buy 'em all. You won't regret it. (fun fact: his son drew the cover art)

So here, below the lyrics by Rich Mullins, is the wonky, slightly blurred, but still so fun video of AP singing my favorite song.

Well the moon moved past Nebraska
And spilled laughter on them cold Dakota Hills
And angels danced on Jacob's stairs
Yeah, they danced on Jacob's stairs
There is this silence in the Badlands
And over Kansas the whole universe was stilled
By the whisper of a prayer
The whisper of a prayer

And the single hawk bursts into flight
And in the east the whole horizon is in flames
I feel thunder in the sky
I see the sky about to rain
And I hear the prairies calling out Your name

I can feel the earth tremble
Beneath the rumbling of the buffalo hooves
And the fury in the pheasant's wings
And there's fury in a pheasant's wings
It tells me the Lord is in His temple
And there is still a faith
That can make the mountains move
And a love that can make the heavens ring
And I've seen love make heaven ring

Where the sacred rivers meet
Beneath the shadow of the Keeper of the plains
I feel thunder in the sky
I see the sky about to rain
And I hear the prairies calling out Your name

From the place where morning gathers
You can look sometimes forever 'til you see
What time may never know
What time may never know
How the Lord takes by its corners this old world
And shakes us forward and shakes us free
To run wild with the hope
To run wild with the hope

The hope that this thirst will not last long
That it will soon drown in the song
Not sung in vain
And I feel thunder in the sky
I see the sky about to rain
And I hear the prairies calling out Your name

Whenever I play this song for Wesley, his eyes always grow big(especially when the thunder is mentioned) and he grins just as wide as I. He doesn't know just yet that what that feeling he has seeping in is the spirit of God speaking to the song in his heart, and I pray that he and Spencer will never lose the wonder that is God's beauty.

It's a good song. And I understand that not everyone is built the same. My friends often smile politely as I gasp on and on about the beauty of this song and it's lyrics or that, but I know God made me this way and he knows how I delight in the beauty of his creation, the excitement that comes with pursuing Him, and the stories and the songs that resonate in my heart...

xo, jade

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

A Gnome By Any Other Name

Wesley's face is the BEST
Our little Gnome Family
I know that my blogging has been slim to none lately. What with wedding season coming to a close and the fall rapidly-ish approaching, I've been sort of bouncing around with the free-er time and the happy cooler weather. And when I say "cooler" I mean, the heat index is no longer 113, and the actual temp is no longer 107. It's been a glorious and steady low 90s and we actually had some magical rain. It was amazing.

Two weeks ago our friends Shayna and Jacob had a joint birthday party for each other. It happened to also be a costume party, which sort of sent me on a frenzy finding the perfect costume for our family. It was a kid-friendly party, so naturally I wanted something that we could all be.

My dear sweet husby was absolutely NO help. Hahaha. He wouldn't make any suggestions that actually made sense. BUT we did finally settle on Gnomeo and Juliet. It was a pretty cute movie and originally the boys were going to be Benvolio and Toad (the mushroom) but we decided to just make them be our little Gnome babies. Mainly because I felt bad one getting a hat and not the other. Plus I knew Spencer wouldn't keep his mushroom hat on and Wesley really wanted to be a gnome. So thus, the little offspring of Gnomeo and Juliet came to be.

The Party (notice I capitalized it) was a great success. We set up a sort of photobooth (butcher paper on the wall and a tripod) with my camera and had great fun with it. We laughed a lot, had a costume contest (with really ridiculous categories) and had some tasty cake. I think we adequately celebrated Shayna and Jacob and made some fun memories too.
Gnomes in love: Juliet and her Gnomeo

 So there you have it. Our Gnomeo and Juliet family costumes. They were super cheap and easy. The hats were 75 cents each and hot glued. Nate made his beard out of a towel. Hahaha. The most expensive thing was my red tights. :) But they are super cute and will probably be worn again.

I told Nate yesterday that I really wanted to throw a halloween party this year in honor of Spencer's first birthday. I am sort of mulling the idea around in my head....

It's still hard to believe that my little baby is going to be ONE in a month. It's exciting and sad...mostly bittersweet. I am excited to celebrate with him, my sweet little gnome baby :)

xo, jade

Sunday, September 04, 2011

A little bit of fall

Ok, it's no surprise to many of you that I am squeaking with anticipation of the fall weather. Summer in south Tejas is just too miserable and I long for the falling leaves and cool bite of autumn. Nate and I were married on a bright, freezing winter day and we honeymooned in the glorious mountains of Estes Park, Colorado.

I geek out whenever I see snow. I am automatically transported to the first memories of Narnia that I had as a child, daydreaming of stamping through the snow under the bright umbrella that belongs to dear Mr. Tumnus. Our linked arms and friendly chatter would warm my heart and I would just grin in joy over the wonderful moment. The snow always dredges up these old, wonderful memories.

And yes, I can likewise stand at the edge of the beach on a hot summer day and imagine seeing Eustace, the dragon, flying overhead and maybe, just maybe, glimpse the Dawn Treader nodding in the distant waves.

Yes. The weather has a deep impact on my senses and can almost always draw me back to Narnia.

This summer has been the hottest of my memory. I never remembered running around the neighborhood in 107 degree heat. We lived outdoors as kids, but our streets have been quiet as people attempt to stay cool. The swings are empty at the playground around the corner from our house and the basketball court only has a few brave players every now and then. Now that school has begun again, it's even quieter.

Our weather forecast for the week!
I was surprised to see that the weather might take a turn for the better this week. I saw on my google homepage that we are going to actually drop into the 80s! For this winter girl, I couldn't be more ecstatic! I feel slightly ridiculous to be so animated about a 15-20 degree drop, but seriously. It's been so hot.

We are taking the boys to the mountains this winter. Wesley's first ever to see snow. I know he will be so excited to experience it and to see the great mountains. He is one who appreciates all the wonders of God's earth.

Ah, so excited am I.

What are your favorite seasons, what weather do you most anticipate throughout the year? And does weather ever affect your nostalgia as it does me? :)

xo, jade

Saturday, September 03, 2011

[on weddings]

I am on serious wedding overload. The emotions, the beautiful moments. I just am swarmed by the images burned into my head of beautiful dresses, gorgeous flowers, kissing couples. It's a wondrous occasion to be a part of and I ESPECIALLY love sharing in it with people I love. <3

I am so blessed to know so many caring, encouraging, and joyful human beings.
Tonight's wedding was no exception. It was marvelous.

But for now, I'll sleep, and dream of cupcakes and sparkly shoes, and lots and lots of laughter...

xo, jade
"To love at all is to be vulnerable"--CSLewis

Tuesday, August 23, 2011


I cannot tell a lie. All the pictures that are being splashed across facebook of the sweet little munchkins on their first day of school are making me emotional. I just read a blog that covered ALL the details of her son's first day of Kindergarten.....and I just nearly lost it.

My firstborn son will be FOUR this winter, my (what I thought was a newborn!) baby will be ONE this fall...and my heart feels as if it will surely burst. How did that happen? Time, why are you so fleeting? Why is this happening so quickly? I still am unsure of the direction we will take with Wesley, education wise, but know this: my tears will be shared with one and all. I look at the growing boys that live beneath our roof and know that Nathan feels the same as me...they are growing too quickly.

My brother has been teasing Wesley. He grabs his cheeks and shakes him and says "NEVER GROW UP" (Adam Sandler reference?) and Wesley responds with "BUT I HAVE TO!!"

I know a lot of moms look forward to the days their kids are in school, needing that time to themselves for personal or work reasons. But I just know that I will miss the boys so much. I feel as if I miss them already, when I look into their eyes and see them changing and growing. I delight in their wonderful milestones, but I do long for the newborn days when I could just snuggle and rock them all day long. It brings me such joy seeing them advance and develop, so don't get me wrong. I WANT to see them grow and pursue life and love and Jesus. I desire to see them grow into strong men with courage and peace and JOY. I have many prayers that go before them for the future. But for now, I will cuddle them close, give kisses, and get down on the floor and play with their race cars (that Uncle probably bought).

I love the sweet, beautiful, adventurous boys that the Lord has chosen Nathan and I to shepherd. I just can't stop marveling quickly they grow. blessed...
xo, jade